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Cleaning part of my room, I was reminded that I used to have a Sports Illustrated subscription when I found an issue from 2005, an “NFL DRAFT SPECIAL” that had to have come out only a week after the draft. I’ll take you through my journey, and we’ll learn that predictions on sports are so crazy sometimes.
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Even when Brandon Marshall holds his own football camp for kids, he still has to deal with criticism. This time, however, the criticism came from someone who probably still eats paste in kindergarten.

Thanks for the epic picture, Orlando Sentinel:

Brandon Marshall has had a few issues to deal with in his personal life during the past six years or so. The new Miami Dolphins wide receiver has had to deal with poor decisions, or as he says “bumped my head a few times,” that involved much publicized arguments, arrests and so on.

But of all the off-the-field troubles the former Winter Park Lake Howell and UCF star has had to deal with, he met his match on Friday morning at his own first annual Brandon Marshall Camp 19 at Lake Howell.
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To conclude the two-part series of best names in the NFL, here’s the AFC edition.

Here are the criteria for deciding the best names:
-Creativity
-Number of words
-Pronounciation
-If it makes you sound like a badass or not
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It’s that time of the off-season again! To get over the woes of no football, I embark on a two-post journey to find the player with the best name on each of the 32 teams in the NFL. Today we start with the AFC, and sooner or later the NFC post will come up.

To refresh your memory, these are the criteria used in deciding what the best name on a team is:
-Creativity
-Number of words
-Pronounciation
-If it makes you sound like a badass or not

Not all names are starters on their team, but they are part of the 53-ish person roster. To see the winning names from last year, here’s the AFC and the NFC edition.
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Consider this one I definitely didn’t see coming, and I’m not being sarcastic. Titans quarterback Vince Young is being considering the most likely guy involved in some kind of altercation at a Dallas strip club.
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In baseball, there are three kinds of basic pitchers: starters, middle relief, and closers. At least, that’s what I think. I’m a football guy talking about baseball, so forgive me if you think I’m wrong. Each kind of pitcher has certain duties they are expected to do.

I got to thinking, why not apply that same theory to the quarterback position in the NFL?
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So, some crap in the NFL has gone down since the last time I wrote. I could either recycle some opinions/jokes about these topics (especially that JaMarcus Russell thing, since that fat guy’s basically SSF’s bread-and-butter (mmm, bread and butter)), or just find something else to write about. Hey, no one’s really writing a bunch on Tim Tebow and the Denver Broncos right now!

Mark Kiszla of the Denver Post feels bad for Kyle Orton in this whole Tebow-drafting situation, in an article titled “Orton should run away from the circus.” Wait a minute… Orton sounds like Horton, who’s an elephant… and Dumbo is also an elephant and he was in the circus! I think I completely over-analyzed Kiszla’s clever headline, but let’s delve in.
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