PLAYOFFPICKS

1-3 last week. Crap.

Steelers over Jets
Right now, I want nothing more than New York to lose. Also, the Jets seem to have calmed down, and it’s pretty hard to carry over being fully pissed off for being disrespected for two straight weeks. Even though they won’t admit it, they’re settling, and the Steelers can definitely take advantage of that. Seriously, the greatest part about this game is that one of these two teams will not make it to the Super Bowl, and I can yell at their fans on Twitter.

Packers over Bears
Both quarterbacks have offensive lines that hate them, but Rodgers can scramble much better and make a play go from doomed to “holy shit 15-yard-gain” often. I honestly thought Green Bay would be gone by now, but they’re resilient as hell, even though they’re battered with injuries (then again, what team isn’t?). Both of the conference championship games are matchups that could really go either way, but I’m going to grab my cojones and say there will be a Pittsburgh-Green Bay Super Bowl (and probably be wrong, but fuck it).

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You’re Making Me Uncomfortable, Terrell Suggs

The divisional matchup between the Steelers and Ravens, known by fans of either team as “AWESOME” and “insufferable” by anyone else, is probably going to result in someone receiving a career-ending injury. That’s the only way it can top Pittsburgh-Baltimore games in the past in brutality and destruction. The minimum amount of concussions in this game has to be three.

Terrell Suggs, however, is really excited for it. He coined a questionable nickname for this game: “ARMAGGEDON.”

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File This Under Things That Make Me Barf

Remember when Ben Roethlisberger’s nose got all smushed up and everyone went “EWWWWW” when they saw the picture above? By the way, you’re welcome for that visual above in case you’re just eating.

Well, Ben got surgery on his nose, but after the game, a doctor told Ben his nose “looked like corn flakes.” DELICIOUS.

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Peace Out, Bro

Click for larger view.

You were an asshole kicker that everyone made fun of, and you’ll probably find a job again soon. Go your ways and never be required to kick on crappy Heinz Field again (unless your team plays there).

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You Need To Apologize For Calling Ben Roethlisberger An Alleged Rapist

I don’t know how public I’ve made it, but I despise the Steelers. I’m not even really sure how it started. I think it’s a combination of being a closet Browns fan and also always losing to the Steelers on Madden video games when I was younger. I still can’t explain how Kordell Stewart could tear apart my secondary, regardless of what team I used.

While reading up about this whole Ben Roethlisberger alleged rape-tastic fiasco, I found this column from the Beaver County (heh) Times, written by some guy named Mark Madden. I’m not a very big fan of tearing apart other writers’ work, and I don’t do it often, but the fact that he was demanding fans to apologize to Big Ben made me filled with rage. Enjoy.. or not.

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I Think It’s Safe To Say The Madden Curse Messed Up Troy Polamalu

The “Madden Curse,” which describes the unfortunate events that have periodically happened to an NFL player when he appears on the cover of the video game, was in question when last year’s fortunate player, Brett Favre, seemed to have a pretty good season, unlike previous cover models Shaun Alexander or Vince Young. With this season’s duo of Larry Fitzgerald and Troy Polamalu on the cover, chances were doubled for a statistical downfall for at least one of the players.

Fitzgerald has been great so far this season despite a couple bumps and bruises, and as of writing this, has 94 receptions for 1,075 yards and 12 touchdowns.

Polamalu, on the other hand, has had one he could probably bear to forget.

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The Second Ever Live-BlogFest Featuring The Steelers And Browns (And Jersey Shore Too Maybe)

Announcing the second ever Live-BlogFest (still working on a catchy name) featuring the Pittsburgh Assholes and the Cleveland Joshua Cribbs… and also maybe Jersey Shore!

Join us to watch a terrible game with snarky commentary!

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Sunday Night Football Live-BlogFest

Welcome to the first live-blog held here at Second-String Fullback. It will be active for the Chargers-Steelers game on Sunday night. Have fun, make jokes, and talk about how your fantasy team did today. Just kidding, no one gives a fuck, but you can try to make us care!

Sunday Night Football Live-BlogFest

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